In the past, the life path of a human being was pretty precise. People use to choose a job, a partner and a place to live – for a lifetime. Most of the time, there wasn’t even a slight thought of a change. And being economically dependent, women use to cling to their faith… Whatever it may be. Nowadays, the idea of alternation is not as radical as it use to be. The mobility and the big changes are completely natural. However, moving out after a breakup is still not less stressful than it was. So if you have just ended the relationship, this one is for you… Here are the things to consider that can help you to find yourself again.
Acknowledge that breakups are awful
First thing first, breakups are bad. And yes, they are really bad no matter how long you have been together and what story is behind you. Unfortunately, there is no switch on and off button for emotions, especially when you live together. So wanting not to be around your ex-significant other is quite normal. And having to maybe even share the bed at that moment is ridiculous but usual occurrence. So the one thing to keep in mind is that life will go on. It is hard to understand it at this point, but this moment shall pass. Remember that moving as a thing is never fun. And remember to trust life that it will bring you something completely new.
Prepare for moving out after a break up
If the anger is involved in the breakup, you may need to think ahead of time. Plan what you will bring with you and how will you discuss keeping the things you want. You may even want to prepare the boxes while your ex is away to avoid unnecessary arguments. You can place them at some place where they are not as visible (like garage or attic). Of course, some items are more meaningful to you than you partner, so think about what you want to keep. Regarding the things you bought together, try to think of a way to buy them of or offer some kind of compensation. You can never predict how it will all be in the end, but being prepared can help you out once you are actually moving out after a breakup.
Kids & pets – the difficult part
The most complicated aspect of breakups is when there are other living beings involved. Once you decide on who has the custody, it is important to keep some kind of routine. Children’s after school activities and other schedules should be respected. Besides, it would be good for them to feel like both of you are there for them at all times. Also, there should be some set of rules and guides that you both agree on so try to stick to these rules. If the relationship was particularly bad, you can always seek legal help if you are not quite sure what to do.
It can be done in a day
If you hire a good moving company, moving out after a breakup can be done in a day. Great movers will pack your things quickly and move everything faster than you think. This is a good way to have a clean breakup without things getting really weird. Prolonging movement can just lead to creating more bad energy between you two. After all, this in now just business and has nothing to do with your relationship. Keep things professional and even set out a schedule for moving out. This can be when your ex partner is at work so you can avoid additional arguments (or even awkward silence).
Support is super important
Call your friends. Hire someone who will help you with things around the house. Accept all the support you may get on the moving day and once you move into a new place. Try searching for a new apartment with a friend. Make a party before even moving in (or a slumber party), so you can connect your new place with positive energy. These are all things that will help you in moving out after a breakup. However, it is very important to know that this is not the time to place a burden on your friends and family. Everything you have with your ex is between you two, so don’t drag them into complicated stories and rely on them to help you with things that had to do with your ex, not them. If you feel really bad, you can even seek professional help.
Embrace the new
When choosing a place, find the space that will make you happy. Fill your new space with the items you like but also with people you love. And remember that whatever you do, try to turn your new place into a home as soon as possible.
Now that you’re single again, it’s time to establish a new lifestyle. And being single is ok. Hey, it can even be great! This is the time to figure out what you really want. This is the time to do all the great things you always wanted to do. Also, you will have more time to spend with your family or focus on learning new skills you always wanted. Lay back and enjoy the process.
When moving out after a breakup, don’t hold onto things just because so. Is there some thing that makes you feel mad or sad? Don’t use this item to get back to your ex and don’t ship it back in a box. Try not to be bitter and cling to small things that you actually don’t need. Better idea is to hide, throw away or even (carefully) destroy anything that you may feel is no longer a part of your life. You can also pack one special box just for yourself before moving out. This should be the box that makes you feel good. Fill it with bath salts, candies, candles, your favorite book, that dress that you look so good in… Or whatever you like. Once you move out, this will be the first box you will open. It will symbolize the new beginnings.
The one thing you should realize is there will be a lot of emotions in moving out after a breakup. It’s ok. You will miss your partner and that is normal. When you feel bad, allow yourself to cry and feel whatever you may be feeling. But feeling lonely is not a permanent feeling. It’s just a stage in life that can even help you to grow as a person. Just think of it as a new beginning.